Karma to love
by mirdaishan
Summary: A Morganders version of episode 13x01: instead of Hodges, it's Greg who's at the hospital with Morgan and she kisses him instead of Hodges. What happens after she says "I'm sorry"?


**Hey everyone, another one shot for you all to enjoy! I'm also working on a multiple chapter Morganders story, hopefully I can find the time to publish the first chapter soon!  
****For now - I hope you'll enjoy this story, it's based on the CSI 13x01 episode, which is - for us Morganders fans - not exactly the best episode. As they're showing the re-run of it on Dutch TV this Monday again, I knew I finally had to write the story that was supposed to be shown on TV. Of course Morgan wouldn't kiss Hodges, she'd kiss Greg! Here's what I came up with, hope you'll enjoy! :)**

_**Karma to love**_

He slowly walked up to her with the bag of clean clothes in his hand, seeing David was with her. The coroner's assistant looked up at him and told him Ecklie was still in surgery.

"I'll be alright, David, you should get back to work," Morgan said to David. Greg could tell she was trying to sound like she really was okay, but he knew her well enough to see she wasn't.

"Are you sure?" David worriedly asked her. She nodded. "Yeah…"

"Okay, but if you need anything, call me!" David said. She nodded again, repeating her response from before, a soft: "Yeah…"

Greg's eyes were locked on Morgan. He wished there was something he could do for her, but he just didn't know what. The only thing that could help her was hearing her father was going to be okay again and that was news he couldn't bring her.

David got up and left them alone. Greg held up the bag of clean clothes to show them to Morgan, feeling a little unsure all of a sudden.

"I, eh, found this change of clothes in your locker," he said to her as she kept her eyes on the floor.

"I remember a car…" she suddenly started, still not looking directly at him. "The sound of a gun… My… my father lying there…"

He saw her trying to fight back her tears.

"But… I didn't see anything!" She sounded almost angry now. "Anyone… Useless!"

He started shaking his head as he saw the tears running down her face now. She still wouldn't look at him, feeling ashamed, he realized. He sat down next to her, putting down the bag of clothes.

"You're not useless," he softly told her. "It's normal not to see everything when something this… this… like this happens," he finally said, hoping it was the least upsetting way to talk about it.

"But I'm a CSI, I should see… remember everything!" Even though the tears were already running down her face, she was still trying to fight them back.

"No, you shouldn't," he said, continuing to use a softer tone of voice. "Morgan, please stop blaming yourself for what happened and stop feeling ashamed about not remembering everything! Please, stop doing this to yourself!"

The tears ran down her face faster and faster, she couldn't hold them back anymore. Carefully, he put one arm around her. When she didn't pull back, he wrapped his other arm around her as well and pulled her into a hug. She broke down completely, crying hysterically with her face pushed against his shoulder. He tried to comfort her by gently stroking his hand up and down her back, using his other hand to hold her tight.

After a few minutes she sat up, wiping away her tears. "I'm sorry… I'll go and get changed."

"Hey…" He grabbed her hand before she was able to walk away. "Don't say you're sorry, you have nothing to be sorry about…"

It looked like she wanted to say something, but she just grabbed the bag of clothes and disappeared in the direction of the ladies' room. Greg watched her leave, a nervous feeling appearing in his stomach. If her father wouldn't make it out of surgery alright… No, he didn't even want to think about it. Conrad Ecklie just had to be alright again! If it wasn't just for himself, then most definitely for Morgan…

When Morgan had changed into the clothes Greg had brought her, she sat back down next to him, just staring at the floor with her hands together. He didn't say anything either, leaving her alone with her thoughts.

After what seemed like forever, a doctor asked for Morgan. She nervously got up and followed him away from the bench they had been sitting on. He watched her closely, hoping he'd be able to tell how Ecklie was doing by the expression on Morgan's face.

Finally, she sat back down next to him, staring at the floor for another few moments. He patiently waited for her to start talking, even though his heart was beating wildly with nerves, afraid of what the news might be.

"He's gonna be okay," she said at last, but she didn't sound as happy as he had expected her to be.

"That's good news," he simply said, waiting for her to start talking again. She was clearly lost in her own thoughts and he didn't want to interrupt them.

"I… thought I lost him," she continued, still staring at the floor. "The whole time in the waiting room I kept thinking to myself: 'If he dies, it's my fault'."

He shook his head again. "There's nothing you could have done!"

She finally looked up at him. "That's not what I mean. When I was a kid, I was so… angry at him. Do you know how many times I prayed… that he would get shot?"

Tears reappeared in her eyes, he could hear she was close to breaking down again.

"That's not your fault either," he said after a moment of silence. She kept looking at him. Suddenly, she bent towards him and kissed him, almost immediately pulling back.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. It felt like his heart stood still. She had just kissed him and now she was sorry? This time he was the one to stare at the floor. From the corner of his eyes he could see she was doing the same thing. What was he supposed to say? He had wanted her to kiss him for such a long time, but now she had finally done it, it just didn't feel right because she had said she was sorry…

"You know what…"

He looked up when she spoke again. She shook her head. "I'm not sorry…"

For the second time she bent towards him and kissed him again, longer and with more love this time. Because he was still too surprised, he didn't respond, making her pull back.

"Kiss me, Greg," she whispered, a begging look in her eyes. Was she only doing this to forget everything? He knew this was exactly what _he_ wanted, but he didn't want to take advantage of her. Neither did this feel like the right time for their first kiss, but when she added a soft "Please" to her request, he couldn't ignore his own feelings anymore. He bent towards her and kissed her.

As soon as his lips touched hers, he knew he wasn't taking advantage of her. She really wanted to kiss him – not to forget everything, but just because she wanted to feel close to him. She deepened their kiss, pulling him closer and closer, not letting go of him. When she finally did let go to catch her breath, she kept her forehead against his. She looked him straight in the eye, still trying to catch her breath. In her eyes he could read those three words that she wasn't supposed to say yet but still wanted to say. He smiled at her, hoping she could read those same three words in his eyes. Judging by her smile, she could.

"Thank you," she whispered. He kissed her as a response. Smiling, she crawled into his arms and for the first time since the shooting, he felt her relax.

When she was finally allowed to see her father, he waited out in the hall, watching her through the window. He didn't think Conrad could see him as he seemed really weak, which was normal of course after what he had been through. Morgan being there seemed to make him feel a little better, though. He watched the two of them together, almost smiling to himself. Suddenly he saw Conrad was looking right at him. He only had a small, weak smile on his face, but Greg knew exactly what it meant: Conrad knew about the two of them and he approved.

A little nervously still Greg waited until Morgan left the room. She immediately grabbed his hand and kissed him.

"I told him," she said, smiling through her tears. She looked straight at him, her smile growing a little bigger. "I really told him I loved him too!"

Smiling as well, he gave her a warm, loving hug. "I'm glad you did…"

She kept smiling as she looked up at him again. "Can I come home with you? I don't wanna be alone tonight…"

He nodded with a reassuring look in his eyes. "Sure. We'll drive by your house so you can pick up some things and then we'll go to my place. I'll call Sara and Russell from the car to see if there's any news."

"Okay…"

He knew she was thinking about everything that was going on right now. He was thinking about it too himself. Wrapping an arm around Morgan's shoulder he started walking towards his car with her. At least one good thing had come out of all this mess: after a year, he and Morgan were finally together.


End file.
